Patrick Somerville quote ✍️

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My heart was crazy now; it's too complicated to know what it was beating for, and how much of it was him and how much of it was the hunting - I think I cared about the deer that got shot - but it didn't matter then. Something was there and its source was irrelevant. It was so easy to feel nothing, all the time, and I held on as hard as I could, because the worst thing, I thought, now, would be for it to go away.
Patrick Somerville The Universe in Miniature in Miniature feelings

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Sickness – Sartre’s first novel
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Hint 1 meaning
Seasickness; hence, any similar sickness of the stomach accompanied with a propensity to vomit; qualm; squeamishness of the stomach; loathing.
Hint 2 anagram
AANEUS
Hint 3 another clue
PERPLEXED state
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